The Lauren Dailey Patented Method

My exploits amused me greatly. And this is a filler post until I can sit down and fill everyone in on the last week of my life. It was mildly eventful.

When Dealing With Non-Writers:

Him: What you do now?
Me: paper
Him: O?
Me: yes
Him: Going well?
Me: hi
Me: ok
Me: i'm just going to lay this out flat
Him: ?
Him: I do something wrong?
Me: 'cause i haven't been able to figure out a way to answer that question that doesn't involve stabbing and/or gratuitous amounts of stabbing. and no, you haven't done anything particularly wrong.
Me: i HATE that question
Him: O.o
Me: with a "i'm going to stab something" passion
Him: I'm sorry.
Me: lol not your fault
Him: I didn't know.
Me: just... avoid the how's it going question when i'm writing
Me: it ends in explitives and possible lead poisoning


You see, I become a horrendous prone to stabbing monster when attempting to write. Even if it is this shitty research paper. It's safer to just leave me the hell alone. Let me sulk and whine and make angry noises and type furiously and backspace even furiouser. Just let me be. Don't ask questions, you clearly won't get any answers. The compulsion monster has taken over and the Lauren who is a functioning member of society has left the building. Interrupting me is a conscious decision on your part and I can not fully be held responsible for any angry faces and/or noises I make in your general direction as a result.

And for god's sake. Don't ask me "how it's going" because all I want to do is rage. Rage, throw tantrums, and stab you with what ever writing utensil I have around. It's the most loaded horrible evil awful question you can ever ask me. If you wrote, you'd understand. But you don't. So just leave me in my horrible depression and angst filled writer's bubble. Eventually I will surface a worn and tattered socially functioning human being. Eventually.

Quote of the Day:

"what's the best way to say "i don't respond well to dumb ass mother fucking questions when i'm writing"
"stop talking, i'm writing"
- Lauren Dailey and Dayna Colbert