In any case, back to the friends thing. (Yeah, I know I really need some new material) Friends are quite nice. I figure I've lost a few this year, which is nothing new honestly, but I've made up for the losses exponentially for once. It's kind of cool. Sure, every few days I wonder what's going on with the ones I don't talk to much anymore, but overall, I'm quite satisfied with my life as is.
Yes, it'd be nice to talk to them some more, and hypothetically I could take the initiative to do so. But, I'm not sure if I can do that. I mean, by all means, I could but it all comes back to my normal problem. I hardly ever want to be the one to make the first move. Because if you don't want me around, I won't be. End of story. It takes two, you know? And if you weren't willing to put forth the effort in the first place, why should I make up that slack now? Yeah, it's probably a little extreme, but unfortunately for everyone I know now I've spent far too much of my time in the past desperately trying to hold on to people who just didn't give a shit. Maybe one day I'll be able to deal better, but for now, effort has to come from both sides and you're probably going to have to initiate. Sorry loves, but I'm not up for that bull shit again.
I'm the same way, except my reasons are slightly different. I'm always the one who comes up with the plans, arranges everything, contacts everyone, etc. And then it just feels like everyone's just doing it because they don't feel like saying no. So sometimes, I just wanna know that they want to spend time with me. But then I usually give in and set things up, because I get lonely XD
ReplyDeleteyeah, i used to be that kind of person, but now i'm just like fuck it. if people wanna see me, they know where i'll be xD
ReplyDeleteoh life, lol
Feeling like one of the "ones I don't talk to much anymore," it would be nice to get some effort from you, dear, especially considering that lovely shit slide you threw me under back in Sept., and then conveniently forgot about. I was serious when I said I didn't want to be one of those people that just blew you off after so long, but a little reciprocity, or even acting as though you care would be appreciated.
ReplyDeleteX. Tif
Well hello there Tif.
ReplyDeleteI'm not entirely sure what I've done to provoke what seems to be an anger fueled posting, but I'm more than willing to talk about it in any free time we both may find. I'd much rather not be textually assaulted in a seemingly random manner on my blog (though I assume that while this may seem somewhat random to myself you probably have a reason for it).
Love, Lauren <3